Rachel: "So, that would be two cups of tarragon, a pound of baking soda... and one red onion?"
Monica: "What the hell are you cooking?!"
Submitted by Rhian182 over 2 years ago
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Phoebe: Ohhh that's your thing, you're the guy that gets divorced!
Ross: I do not love divorce.
Phoebe: Yes you do! This is your 3rd divorce. You love divorce so much you should probably marry it, and then divorce it because you love divorce so much, divorcing guy.. hahaha... I'm so drunk.
Normally I don't like sweaty guys, but this one.. I could just mop him up!
Phoebe: Hey. Why isn't it Spidermen? You know, like Goldmen, Silvermen.
Chandler: Because, it... it's not his last name.
Phoebe: It isn't?
Chandler: No. It's not like Phil Spidermen. He's a spider MAN. You know, like Goldmen is a last name but there's no gold man.
Phoebe: Oh, oh okay... There should BE a gold man!
Three failed marriages, two illegitimate children... The personal ad writes itself!
Ross: I love marriage...
Phoebe: Seriously? You?... Divorce-O?
Ross: If you have to call me a name I'd prefer 'Ross the Divorcer'. It's just cooler.
We are gathered here today on this joyous occasion to celebrate the special love that Monica and Chandler share. It is a love based on giving and receiving. As well as having and sharing. And the love that they give and have is shared and received. And through this having and giving and sharing and receiving, we too can share and love and have and receive.
Ross : You're not going to win the lottery.
Rachel : Yes, I know the odds are against us, but someone has to win, and it could be us! And how are you going to feel when we're all like 'Hey guys, shall we get in our helicopter and fly up to the cape' and you're like 'Oh sorry guys, I'll have to meet you up there. I've gotta go gas up the Hyundai'.
Joey: Remember when you where a kid and your Mom would drop you off at the movies with a jar of jam and a little spoon?
Rachel: You're so pretty.
Monica: Y'know, all these years, I thought you were on my side. But maybe what you were doing was sucking up to Mom and Dad so they'd keep liking you better!
Ross: Hey, I married a lesbian to make you look good!
Parker: I'm sorry if I put a good spin on everything. It's who I am, I'm a positive person.
Phoebe: No, I'm a positive person. You're like Santa Claus... on prozac... in Disney Land... getting laid
There was a crooked man, who had a crooked smile, who lived in a shoe, for a...while
Ross: Don't you want a washboard stomach and rock-hard abs?
Chandler: No! I want a flabby gut and saggy man-breasts!
Monica: MICHAEL FLATTLEY LORD OF THE DANCE!
Joey: The Irish jig guy??!?
Chandler: HIS LEGS FLAIL ABOUT AS IF INDEPENDENT FROM HIS BODY!
Say Rachel, how would you like to go to a movie sometime? ..... As my lover.