mjrider’s most recent Quotables

Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You too? I thought I was the only one."

Snakes. They're like bits of rope, only angrier.

That thing you burned up isn't important to me. It's the fluid catalytic cracking unit. It made shoes for orphans. Nice job breaking it, hero.

I’m not bald! I just have a really high widow's peak.

Didn’t we have some fun though? Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I said ‘Goodbye’ and you were like ‘NO WAY!’ and then I was all ‘We pretended we were going to murder you’? That was great.

I recently learned something quite interesting about video games. Many young people have developed incredible hand, eye, and brain coordination in playing these games. The air force believes these kids will be our outstanding pilots should they fly our jets.

Only presidents, editors and people with tapeworm have the right to use the editorial 'we'.

The right word might be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

Never let your schooling interfere with your education.

Remember people will judge you by your actions, not your intentions. You may have a heart of gold; but so does a hard-boiled egg.

Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning "lousy hunter."

Grammar is important. Capitalization is the difference between helping your Uncle Jack off a horse & helping your uncle jack off a horse.

Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you want and let the food fight it out inside.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.