kellytron’s most recent Quotables

You know what happens when you get out of the Marine Corps? You get your brains back.

Single Dadness is not as easy as it looks... I barely have time to get loaded anymore

They scream, they sing, they fall down, they take their clothes off, they cross-dress, they vomit. It is only the British people - not the Germans or the French.

You know, like nunchuk skills, bow hunting skills, computer hacking skills...Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills.

Come bust a move
Where the games are played
It's chill, it's fresh,
it's Noah's Arcade

All discarded lovers should be given a second chance, but with somebody else.

Garth, marriage is punishment for shoplifting in some countries.

If Harry Potter's so magical, why can’t he cure his own eyesight and get laid. A teenage lad shouldnt need a broomstick to cling onto.

You ever notice that everyone who believes in creationism looks really unevolved? Eyes real close together, big furry hands and feet. "I believe God created me in one day." Yeah, looks like He rushed it.

This crack is really moreish.

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.

I have noticed even people who claim everything is predestined, and that we can do nothing to change it, look before they cross the road.