Food Quotes

Because I am both a glutton and a masochist, my standard complaint, "That was so bad," is always followed by "And there was so little of it!"

"Only a rank degenerate would drive 1,500 miles across Texas without eating a chicken-fried steak."

I really like to eat alone. I want to start a chain of restaurants for other people like me called ANDY-MATS - "The Restaurant for the Lonely Person." You get your food and then you take your tray into a booth and watch television.

If you know beans about chili, you know chili ain't got no beans.

If you know beans about chili, you know chili ain't got no beans.

You know it's a sad day when your child looks at you and asks 'Daddy, are these organic?'

It's like a crime scene in my pants

I regularly ate health food cookies so disgusting that when I enthusiastically gave one to Rachel Dratch, she drew a picture of a rabbit and broke the cookie into a trail of tiny pieces coming out of the rabbit’s butt.

Can I share with you my worldview? All of humankind has one thing in common: the sandwich. I believe that all anyone really wants in this life is to sit in peace and eat a sandwich.

The French don't believe custard exists.

Flops are a part of life's menu, and I've never been a girl to miss out on any of the courses.

Eat food. Not too much. Mostly plants.

Devon: You know, revenge is a dish best served cold, Jack. Like sashimi ... or pizza.
Jack: You prefer cold pizza?
Devon: The morning after? It's the best.
Jack: Better than hot pizza? That's insane.
Devon: You don't tell me what kind of pizza to like. You don't tell me anything anymore, Jack!

Black cockatoos come crying over
unflapping as Blériot monoplanes
to crash in pine tops for the cones.

If music is the food of love, play on.

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food.

...eating and reading are two pleasures that combine admirably. Of course not all books are suitable for mealtime reading. It would be a kind of blasphemy to read poetry at table.

The human frame being what it is, heart, body and brain all mixed together, and not contained in separate compartments as they will be no doubt in another million years, a good dinner is of great importance to good talk. One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.

Ye Pow'rs, wha mak mankind your care,
And dish them out their bill o' fare,
Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware
That jaups in luggies;
But, if ye wish her gratefu' prayer
Gie her a haggis!

But mark the Rustic, haggis-fed,
The trembling earth resounds his tread.
Clap in his walie nieve a blade,
He'll mak it whissle;
An' legs an' arms, an' hands will sned,
Like taps o' trissle.