Drunk Quotes

Yes, I'm drunk. But you are beautiful. And tomorrow morning I'll be sober, but you'll still be beautiful.

The aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware, joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware

I am apologizing, in advance, to whomever may receive a drunken phone call or text from me (or my cell phone!) this coming weekend. It's going to be FUN!

Tonight... I'm drinking until I'm someone else's problem!

It's Friday... Whatever I do tonight, didn't really happen if I don't remember it in the morning!!!

The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one.

An American monkey, after getting drunk on brandy, would never touch it again, and thus is much wiser than most men.

The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss the person you're married to.

Elinor looked at him with greater astonishment than ever. She began to think that he must be in liquor.

Life is a waste of time. Time is a waste of life. Get wasted all the time and you'll have the time of your life.

I've been drunk for about a week now, and I thought it might sober me up to sit in a library.

If all be true that I do think,
There are five reasons we should drink;
Good wine—a friend—or being dry—
Or lest we should be by and by—
Or any other reason why.

You're not really drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

You've crossed the line from lubricated to morose. Goodnight.

You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.

For a bad hangover take the juice of two quarts of whisky.

The best way to avoid a hangover is to stay drunk.