Apatow Quotes

He's a really nice guy and all but I'm pretty sure that he is a serial murderer.

Yup. She was a ho. [Pause] For sho.

I’m a virgin. I always have been.

He's a gym teacher. There's no upward mobility.

This is Mission Control requesting permission to rock out.

She's hanging with a bad crowd. She's lying and cheating and next thing you know, she's Patty Hearst with a gun to our heads.

I don't really like jokes. I don't think they're funny.

I'm Jewish. That's no cakewalk either. Last year I was elected school treasurer. I didn't even run!

I love being told not to drink by a pot-head hippie guidance counselor.

I guess you'd prefer we listen to that punk rock music I've been reading about. You know those Sex Pistols? They spit on their audience! Yep, that's what I wanna do. Spend my hard earned money to be spit on. Now that's entertainment.

All my new friends think I'm some goody-two-shoes and all my old friends think I'm throwing my life away. What the hell am I supposed to do?