Howard Wolowitz Quotes

I never lie about math or sex

I lost my virginity to my cousin Jeanie!

Does that include doing the cyber nasty? The digital pickle tickle?

I've got a blog to find!

We're looking for Sheldon, not Marmaduke!

That sounds like me... but no!

I'm a romantic!

No, it's like ''This fish tastes bad, so I'm gonna slow down and spit it out!''

My guess is 4 miutes new record. That's why I am the funny one.

With my luck - Hepatitis!

Sheldon, you remember the first few weeks we were looking for magnetic monopoles and not finding anything, and you were acting like an obnoxious, giant dictator?

Easy. Instead of saying; "No, we don't wanna go on an NSF expedition," say, "No, we don't wanna spend three months stuck in a cabin in the Arctic Circle with an anal nutbag!"

Quirky? That crazy bastard is looking at quirky in the rear-view mirror.

Interesting, I think what you might need to know about my colleague is that, though she claims her field of interest is tiny organisms, she sure has spent her fair share of time around what we can assume pretty massive weaponary!

Koothrappali is gonna wet himself. I am gonna throw up. Sheldon will run away and you are going to die. Should we synchronize our watches?

Okay, he's invited for dinner in the bottled city of Kandor. He miniaturizes himself and he loses his superpowers. Now, before dinner his host says "Who's up for a little Kryptonian tether ball?" Superman says "Sure," works up a sweat, comes back to Earth - his uniform now stained with indestructible Kryptonian perspiration.

Good God, what have we done?

Nobody cares where you're going to sit, you're not crazy.

I don't care what the bosoms say, I just wanna be part of the conversation.

Really? That's your question; when did he put the ramp in?